birthday

Birthday Discombobulation by Liz

I've always had a love/hate relationship with my birthday.  Love the anticipation, hate the possible letdown.  And even though I'm not one of those people that needs a huge celebration each year,  I still always dread the inevitable birthday discombobulation. From the L&L  dictionary:

Birthday Discombobulation(birth-day dis-come-bob-you-lay-shun) The heightened sensitivity that one's birthday won't be the best day of the year.  Usually associated with erratic behavior, tears and possible temper tantrums.  Can be intensified by "milestone" birthdays.

C'mon, admit it-you've all had this at least a few times. Especially as more birthday candles keep mysteriously appearing on your cake each year. (How am I thirty-seven already? And when did all these damn wrinkles show up?)  For me, Birthday Discombobulation (or BD as I like to call it), usually starts a few weeks before the big day.  And it's often triggered because the Type A'er in me really, really wants to be in control  what we do that night.  Which should work out fine, right?

Well it would, except for the fact that there's a super secret sensitive beyotch lurking inside me that wants my husband to:

A) Read my mind about what I'd like to do.

B) Then plan it exactly the way I would.

And most importantly:

C) Buy me a gift that I didn't ask for but have always secretly wanted (mind reading also comes in handy here...).

Should be a piece of cake, right?  Um, no.  Not really.  The reality is that many of us make it impossible for our significant others to succeed in pleasing us on our birthdays.  In fact, last year, I had a MAJUH BD meltdown over a necklace (long story!  But you can read about it here).

And the lesson learned from that fiasco?  If you want to have a fabulous birthday, you need to cut the people around you a bit of slack. Well, okay, maybe that's what I should have learned. Because, here we are, less than one week from my bday, and I can feel the BD trying to take hold of me again. And I.  Must. Fight. It. Off.

They say self-awareness is the first step.  And now that I know this sh*t is about to take over my birthday again, I've developed a four-step BD avoidance plan.

Step One: Tell the hubs where I want to go to dinner that night. You know, somewhere fun, but not too loud, but not too quiet, that is really chic, but also not too expensive.  Somewhere with enough beautiful people to make me feel cool about being there, but not  so hawt that I feel fat and old. Oh, and no, I don't have anywhere specific in mind. See? I made it easy.

Step Two: Upgrade from birthday happy hour with the girls to full night GNO.  Well, okay, maybe my super fabulous friends put this into effect.  But either way, birthday GNO is the BEST! Say it with me: G-N-O, G-N-O!

Step Three: Fly your best friend in. Well, okay, maybe Lisa is already flying in that day for something else. But I'm going to pretend it's just for me.

Step Four: Realizing what a complete ass I sound like when whining about BD. And the fact that my husband practically needs a Xanax prescription each September to get through this time?  Not cool.  (In my defense, I do RAD stuff for his birthday every year!  So at least I'm not a BD hypocrite.)

Now I'm clearly ready for birthday success, right?  The first hurdle?  This coming weekend with the hubs. And I can just feel that THIS will be the year that I conquer BD.  And if for some reason I don't, well, I'll drown it in Grey Goose.

And since it's almost my birthday, I feel like giving something away.  How about two signed copies of our debut, I'll Have Who She's Having? It just won best debut novel over at Chick Lit Plus! Leave a comment here to enter and I'll choose a name on Friday night.

And to all my fellow Libra's, here's to BD-free birthdays!

xoxo, Liz